Stepfamily Issues

Personal stories about stepfamilies, childhood and general family issues.


December 14, 2006

my stepsister the poisoner

Ramona's mother married a divorced man with custody of his 12-year old daughter who, when Ramona was born, was so jealous that she tried to kill her.

"I believe women shouldn't marry men with older children and that families should stop having children when the eldest child in the family is approaching 13 because it is a very dangerous age and little babies risk being maimed or murdered by the older sibling."

"I've seen it in countless families," sighs Ramona, "and it pains me greatly to learn from my mother about the terrible things that my stepsister did to me when I was born."

"After my mother caught 13-year old Maria trying to smother me with a pillow she was afraid to leave me alone," says Ramona.

"Of course I cannot remember much of what happened in my first year of life but several terrible things did happen to me at Maria's hands that I am still suffering from today."

"Several times my mother had to rush me to hospital with poisoning symptoms and she told me that Maria had once put some caustic cleaning fluid in my feeding bottle."

"It's a wonder that I lived through the terrible things that Maria did to me," says Ramona, "and sometimes I wish that I had not lived because I am 25 now, still living at home and still suffering from stomach troubles and nervous troubles that prevent me leading a normal life."

"Mom said that Maria was jealous of me and that's why she tried to kill me," explains Ramona, "and remembering what I was like at 13 I know that my own behavior changed for the worse at that age."

"Maria was going through adolescent rebellion when I arrived and mom said she hated me from the start," explains Ramona. "I'm not making excuses for my stepsister, but when you have to put up with a little baby who cried day and night like I did, I guess it was horrible for her. And yet I was crying so much because Maria might have been sticking pins in me or maybe I was just picking up on all the negativity around me, my mother's unhappiness, my father's anger and my stepsister's hatred."

"Maria ran away from home at 15, two years after I was born," explains Ramona, "and she never really came back to the family."

"She's 38 now and for all I know has children of her own," sighs Ramona. "I wonder if she remembers what she did to me and how she'd feel if someone did the same to her baby."

"It's true that Maria cursed me," says Ramona, "yet my parents must also take responsibility because you no more leave a baby with a 13-year old -- stepsister or real sister or neighbor -- than you leave it with a mad dog."

"I guess mom lets me stay at home and takes care of me so good because she feels guilty," says Ramona. "Dad says I should get over whatever Maria did to me and gets angry when my mom talks about it."

"He says that if mom hadn't told me these things I'd be none the wiser," sighs Ramona, "and I guess he's right about that."

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